It is reported that speed bumps increase air pollution as they prevent cars driving at a constant speed and this results in unnecessary deaths.

The sleeping policeman we don’t like,
Designed to slow your car or bike,
And which gets always on your wick,
Is coming in now for some stick.

It seems they are not all that green,
A bad thing on the city scene,
For as you’re learning in this verse,
They make your car’s pollution worse.

The problem is, you might have guessed,
When bound for North, South, East or West,
As well they make you curse and frown,
They really do make you slow down.

The method is to hit the brakes –
A second is just all it takes –
Then when the obstacle is past,
You can go back to driving fast.

This havoc with the engine plays,
In many complicated ways,
But basically I can tell you,
Your engine makes more NO2,
And though it’s hard for you to tell,
It makes more other things as well.

If these pollutants get too high,
It’s claimed that older folk will die,
But with their lives they don’t quite pay,
For they will all die anyway.

So probably the real truth,
Devoid of spin and also spoof,
Is life expectancy will fall,
A figure that applies to all,
Which would be good for – have a guess –
Our old beleaguered NHS!

Image – Wikimedia commons

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