It is reported that the Dean of York Minster has sacked the cathedral’s bell ringers and invitations to ringers from other churches to come and ring at Christmas have fallen on deaf ears.

York Minster’s bells are rather good,
They used to ring them as they should,
But now the church doth ringers lack,
Because they gave them all the sack.

It seems they had said something mean,
To she in charge – that is the Dean,
And so she sacked them all outright,
Which means that on this Christmas night,
Although glad tidings it should bring,
There won’t be anyone to ring.

So with the ringers now all gone,
It’s not since 1361,
That York’s fine peal of bells will be,
Seeing in Christmas silently.

Quite how they know this I don’t know,
It’s likely someone had to go,
And check church records way back when,
’Cos Google wasn’t with us then.
And neither, though it’s hard to gauge,
Did we then have the printed page.

But anyway I do digress,
The Dean now sees she’s in a mess,
And so to ringers far and wide,
She has invited them inside,
To come and merry carols play,
On Christmas night and Christmas day.

But ringers now are all uptight,
About their Yorkist colleagues plight,
And they say as they drink mulled wine,
They will not cross the picket line.

They’ll all forego the chance to ring,
These bells which have the finest ‘ding’,
And this will be the reason why,
There’ll just be … Merrily on High.

So down in York this Christmas night,
Things will not seem completely right,
There’ll be a choice as you will see –
It’s Silent Night or a CD!

Image – flickr

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