It is reported that Theresa May has banned Russian politicians and oligarchs from attending Conservative Party fund-raising dinners as she doesn’t want them consorting with government ministers for security reasons.

“Hello, this is Theresa May,
I’m ringing as I have to say,
Our dinner will proceed as planned,
Including guests who’ll sit or stand.

That is the good news, now the bad:
Because of the bad press you’ve had,
We won’t be sending you invites,
So don’t go booking any flights.

The reason is you’re mostly spies,
You take things in with both your eyes,
And if there’s intel. you still lack,
You’ll try to get it with a hack.

So hobnobbing with people who,
Are all in government like you,
But not on your side of the fence,
Is not such great intelligence.

So I’m afraid you’ve been declined,
It’s tough if you now feel maligned,
But if you’re into cyberwar,
It’s what you have been asking for.

And while we’re at it p’rhaps you’d see,
Your men behave themselves with tea,
For rather clumsy they were when,
They put polonium 210,
In Litvinenko’s pot of tea –
A dreadful way to poison he.

So all in all your credit score,
Won’t even get you through the door,
And ’til your people all behave,
You won’t be coming to our rave.”

Image – Flickr

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