MONEY MONEY MONEY …

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It is reported that restaurants that play ABBA music get bigger tips.

Now restaurant music, live or canned,
With singers, or perhaps a band,
Is often for the diners played,
While eating and before they’ve paid.

Some people like it, some do not,
While others might but not a lot,
But it is clear that it does set,
The ambience that they will get.

The ambience, if it’s not right,
Can make the diners rather tight,
Whereas some different music may,
Encourage them some more to pay.

I speak of tips, you may have guessed,
Along with nearly all the rest,
And recently it has been found,
Tips are more likely to abound,
When ABBA is the group of choice,
With instruments and also voice.

Their music while they eat their food,
Puts people in a happy mood,
And this, as many people say,
Means they will likely extra pay.

So ‘Dancing Queen’ and ‘Waterloo’,
To mention only one or two,
Should be the music best to play,
At night and also in the day,
So restaurants can get to grips,
And maximise their diners’ tips.

So if you’re eating out beware,
Don’t take with you much cash that’s spare,
For if they songs of ABBA play,
You might just give it all away.

Image – Bank of England

MONEY! MONEY! MONEY!

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In the aftermath of the general election it is reported that Jeremy Corbyn has a plan to increase the minimum wage for sixteen to eighteen year olds to £10 per hour.

So Corbyn very nearly won,
Because young voters thought the sun,
As I’ll now try to rhyme and parse,
Shone all the time out of his arse.

The reason really is quite clear,
For he had given them a steer,
That uni fees would all be scrapped,
At which young people were all rapt.

With other things on offer too,
Made to the many, not the few,
So many people would cash in,
That they would likely vote for him.

But since he lost he’s got a plan,
That every teenage boy or man,
Should have their hourly rate increased,
To ten pounds, doubling it at least.

“So vote for me! You’ll be quids in.
All this is true, it isn’t spin,
And money for this higher rate,
Will be paid by the ones we hate;
The ones you always ought to boo –
That’s not the many but the few!”

So Corbyn in his power grab,
Makes out it will be really fab,
With everybody due a treat,
Once he’s installed in Downing Street.

The upshot, though, is that these yobs,
Will all be priced out of their jobs,
And Corbyn’s plan will be complete,
When there are riots in the street.

So let your watchword be ‘Take care’,
When you’re assessing Corbyn there,
It’s better you’ve a job than not,
So kick him out – he’s just a Trot!