BULLIES!

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It is reported that the Belgian Prime Minister has accused the United States of ‘putting a gun to the EU’s head’ during trade negotiations; something the EU would never do. Ask Theresa May.

You know that Donald Trump is for,
A world-wide, global all out war,
I don’t mean one that’s weapons grade,
But rather one affecting trade.

He threatens he will punish those,
He doesn’t like and will impose,
More tariffs on all sorts of things,
From steel and cars to earrings.

The EU says, “That’s so unfair!
To tax goods that are going spare.
And this is threatening, what you’ve said,
It’s like a gun against our head.

Now we would not behave like this,
Just ask the English, ask the Swiss;
We’re in discussion everywhere,
And all the time are more than fair.”

The English and the Swiss then sighed,
“It sounds like the EU has lied;
They set up meetings tête à tête,
But really don’t negotiate,
And if you don’t do as they say,
They give you a big bill to pay.

For they are bullies, simply put,
They walk around the room and strut;
They simply blurt out their demands,
And also lots of reprimands.

They are frustrating, that’s for sure,
Drive you to products of the brewer,
But one day they’ll run out of luck,
And that’s when they will come unstuck!

They rule, more or less, by decree,
Which doesn’t work when folk are free;
They don’t allow too much debate,
So one day will disintegrate.

For people won’t be pushed around,
Will vote with feet is what we’ve found;
For some it is the final straw,
And what we’re doing Brexit for.

CAN MAN

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It is reported that Donald Trump plans to impose punitive tariffs of 25% on steel and 10% on aluminium imported into the United States, and the European Union has announced severe retaliation plans.

It’s been announced that Trump has plans,
For metals used in cars and cans,
To soon be taxed at higher rates,
When they reach the United States.

He says that they are under threat,
For Chinese steel producers let,
Their factories now produce too much,
Of steel for cars and cans and such.

And since this steel cannot be used,
He says that rules have been abused,
As they then tons of metal dump,
Upon the land of Donald Trump.

But Trump’s taxation plan is wide,
And will affect much more beside,
As special steels used for defence,
Are taxed which makes a bit less sense.

These taxes affect the EU,
So they’re now getting upset too,
And so henceforward from today,
They say that Trump will have to pay.

“For tax like this we will not stand,
But as well as a reprimand,
We are intending to impose,
A higher import tax on those,
Products which we’ve come to expect,
Will have the maximum effect.

We’ve thought a lot, done studies too,
On what might cause most harm to you;
And the best option from these facts,
Will be a peanut butter tax!

A tax like this is very wise,
Applies to jars of any size,
And whether smooth or with a crunch,
It will affect most any lunch.

But here in Brussels EU staff,
Think peanut butter’s pretty naff;
With Michelin starred food each day,
They never eat it anyway.”